I Forgot I Had That -

February 27th, 2015

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Cleaning out the van the other day and there it was.  The DVD of Finding Nemo that we thought we had lost or loaned away.

 Clearing my desk a few weeks ago and there it was.  An un-deposited check that would help to pay a bill.

 Looking in the storage unit for the extra seat for the van we just sold… and there it was, a favorite toy of our daughter.

 Organizing my books in our new book nook and there THEY were!  All those really great books I was going to get around to reading.

 Don’t even get me going on  what might be on those back up hard drives!

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 There are people diving deep into the oceans looking for treasures.

Maybe we don’t need to  go to deep water to find them.  Maybe some of the most valuable things we would like to find our hidden from our view because of other stuff….because of the mess.

 I was looking for a deeper connection to our 16 year old son the other day.

He was bummed because he had just gotten his license and then wrecked the family car just 2 days later.

I was just grateful no one was hurt and that he was OK.

But he wasn’t OK…. he was distant and discouraged.

And my attempts to connect and lift his spirits seemed to be falling flat.

 I wished I could fly with him to New York and we could watch a Broadway Play together.  (his favorite thing in the world).  But this was not possible.  I thought of several other things like this …but the messy schedules we had didn’t make it possible.   Finally I was able to clear my mind(clean up the mess) and then I felt to offer him the same chance to clear his.

 “Hey son, why we take a drive in this cool new rental car and push all the buttons, open the sun roof and turn on some tunes.  Let’s go for a joy ride.”

 Dad, whats a joy ride?  (dang it I am old)

 I attempt to explain, “A joy ride is just driving without intending to go anywhere — you just drive, empty your mind of worry, let thoughts come and go, feel the wind in your hair,  and enjoy the drive. “

 Sounds great Dad…let’s go.

 And we drove, and we drove and listened to ZZ TOP and other songs from when I wasn’t  old.  

There was a guy selling Jerky by the side of the road and we stopped and talked with him and bought some.  

And then we drove and pushed all the buttons and chewed on jerky.  

And there was a guy by the side of the road selling bee pollen and honey…. and we bought some and then we listened to some of Josh’s music.  Josh didn’t want to try the bee pollen or honey, so we didn’t.  

And after a couple hours we drove home.

Josh said, “I’m glad we did this Dad, I like Joy Riding”.

 And I thought about how much I love him and about how much I will treasure this drive….for a long long time.

 And I thought about how easy it is to lose site of the most important things in our life because of the mess.

 Clean Your Room,

Clear Your Mind,

and Enjoy the Ride…

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The Great Thing About Right Now

February 26th, 2015

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“I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act.  The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness.” Abraham Maslow

 

The great thing about right now is that right now I can choose to act.  I can choose to change, to grow, to become.

 

You can call me Mr. Right Now- Kirk out

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When We Need Air

February 25th, 2015

A couple days ago I heard a story that I had heard before.  But this time it has kept echoing in my mind so I want to share it in hopes that it may perhaps be of use to you on your leadership journey.

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A Young Man Asked Socrates The Secret To Success.

Socrates Told The Young Man To Meet Him Near The River The Next Morning. They Met. Socrates Asked The Young Man To Walk With Him Toward The River. When The Water Got Up To Their Neck, Socrates Took The Young Man By Surprise And Ducked Him Into The Water. The Boy Struggled To Get Out But Socrates Was Strong And Kept Him There Until The Boy Started Turning Blue.

Socrates Pulled His Head Out Of The Water And The First Thing The Young Man Did Was To Gasp And Take A Deep Breath Of Air.

Socrates Asked, ‘What Did You Want The Most When You Were There?”

The Boy Replied, “Air.” Socrates Said, ”

That Is The Secret To Success. When You Want Success As Badly As You Wanted The Air, Then You Will Get It.” There Is No Other Secret.

 

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A Burning Desire Is The Starting Point Of All Accomplishment.

Just Like A Small Fire Cannot Give Much Heat, A Weak Desire Cannot Produce Great Results.

 

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And if that doesn’t work .. then maybe instead of wanting it like AIR… we can sell it.

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Today I will nurture, grow and focus more clearly on what I really desire.

 

Kirk Out

 

 

Why We Lie - Gentle Reminders

February 24th, 2015

Listen for the “Leadership Lesson” at the end.

I love how they taught these gentle moral reminders need to be in the “right way” - not a lecture but gentle reminders.  It’s how I like to learn too!

Reminded me of the saying, “Most people don’t need to be taught, as much as they just need to be reminded.”

I can think of many ways to use this in my leadership journey with people I work with, and people I live with.

I would love to hear about how you intend to put “wake up” calls to work in your culture and leadership journey.

Kirk out

Opportunity - Don’t Miss It

February 23rd, 2015

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We still live in a world that’s filled with opportunity. In fact, we have more than an opportunity — we have an obligation. An obligation to spend our time doing great things. To find ideas that matter and to share them. To push ourselves and the people around us to demonstrate gratitude, insight, and inspiration. To take risks and to make the world better by being amazing. ~ Seth Godin

 

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Crazy Disguises - Must be Why I keep missing it.  :)

 

Kirk Out

When People Declare Their Honesty

February 20th, 2015

It’s Friday - We have worked hard… I suggest we end the week with a bit of humor.

Let’s have a Dilbert Day

Do you ever wonder about people who you declare their honesty…but only occasionally?

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Did you every work with someone who said something like what is represented in the last square of the following strip?

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Did you ever  think… maybe your hanging around the wrong people?

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 Or perhaps your hanging around the right people.  :)

Kirk Out

 

Charge Like Picasso

February 19th, 2015

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Nearly 18 years ago I decided to step away from my regular paying corporate job and start responding to invitations and requests to come speak about corporate culture. One of the big questions I first faced was. “Kirk, what do you charge?” At first I thought well it’s just for an hour so I suggested a price that I thought was pretty high. Fortunately the person on the other end of the phone loved me enough to give me some coaching….and give me a raise. The essence of what they said is summed up nicely in the 3 following examples.

 Legend has it that Pablo Picasso was sketching in the park when a bold woman approached him.

 “It’s you - Picasso, the great artist! Oh, will you please sketch my portrait and charge accordingly! I insist.”

 So Picasso agreed to sketch her. After studying her for a moment, he in a few short moments completed her sketch. He handed the women his work of art.

 “It’s perfect!” she gushed. “You managed to capture my essence. Thank you! How much do I owe you?”

 “Five thousand pounds,” the artist replied.

 “B-b-but, what?” the woman sputtered. “How could you want so much money for this picture? It only took you a few minutes to draw it!”

 To which Picasso responded, “No Madame, it took me my entire life.”

 (Don’t charge by the hour… charge by expertise you bring to each hour.)

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KNOWING WHERE TO HAMMER

A man was suffering a persistent problem with his house. The floor squeaked. No matter what he tried, nothing worked. Finally, he called a carpenter who friends said was a true craftsmen. The craftsmen walked into the room, and heard the squeak. He set down his toolbox, pulled out a hammer and nail, and pounded the nail into the floor with three blows.

The squeak was gone forever. The carpenter pulled out an invoice, on which he wrote the total of $45. Above the total were two line items:

Hammering , $2
Knowing where to hammer, $43

Charge for knowing where to hammer!

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Just last week I spent 3 hours with my dentists… he charged me $1600. Just over $500 an hour. I happily paid him because I was confident that he was going to do the right work on the right teeth. I paid him for his wisdom and his work. And in part I paid for at least some of the time he had spent preparing and qualifying himself to do the work.

In summary… NEVER CHARGE BY THE HOUR  - Instead - Charge by the expertise and experience you bring to each hour!

Kirk Out

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Not There Yet

February 18th, 2015

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I can relate to this.  On perhaps more occasions than I prefer to admit I am disappointed in my progress.  I sometimes find myself getting impatient with others because they are not “there yet”.  And then I am embarrassed and frustrated with myself because I said I wasn’t going to be impatient with others.  I said I was going to allow people be where they were without judgment.  But then I didn’t.

 

Sometimes I am even embarrassed that I need to be reminded to be patient.  Dang it, I am just not there yet!

 

But when I coach and encourage others I ask them to take note of their progress, to acknowledge the growth they have experienced, and  gains they have made.  We usually conclude that “That they were doing far better than they thought.”

 

It’s often much harder to see the growth in ourselves than it is to see it in others.  But that doesn’t mean it isn’t happening…only that we don’t, can’t or won’t see it.

 

Be honest…. be logical, and be consistent.  If it’s true for them, it’s true for you.  We may not be there yet… heck we may never be “there” but we can, and most likely are, closer than we were yesterday.

 

Kirk Out

 

Where the heck is “there” anyway?

 

How are You Being?

February 17th, 2015

Here’s a bit of wisdom from the Arbinger Institute. (They wrote one my favorite books, Leadership and Self Deception
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Considering :WHAT WE DO and HOW WE BE

 

In anything we do, there are two distinct elements — there is ‘what’ we do, and there is ‘how’ we are being when we do that thing. Our attention to the difference between these two elements can change everything — our way of being with our families, our way of working, our way of teaching, and even the way we measure our success in any aspect of our lives. (The Arbinger Institute)

Instead of just saying to others …. “Hey, how are you doing?”…. we might be wise to ask ourselves “how are we being?” as we do the activities of our lives.

Kirk Out

The Most Dangerous Dreamers are the Day Kind

February 16th, 2015

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Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, to make it possible. !from the book -Way of the SEAL

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Kirk Out… and Awake

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